"I’ve Got A Disease That Wants To Kill Me": Robbie Williams Speaks Frankly About His Struggle With Health Condition


"I’ve Got A Disease That Wants To Kill Me": Robbie Williams Speaks Frankly About His Struggle With Health Condition



Robbie Williams: his struggle with depression and addiction, and how he found hope

Depression is the most common mental health issue in the world. It’s estimated that 1 in 6 to 1 in 5 people are affected by the condition. Sadly, many of them don’t realize they have it, and many of those who do are reluctant to talk about it. But not Robbie Williams. The British pop-rock icon has talked about his depression and struggle with addiction on multiple occasions.


In an interview with The Sun, the singer said:

I’ve got a disease that wants to kill me, and it’s in my head, so I have to guard against that.

Sometimes, it overwhelms me and sometimes, it’s a tool I need to get on stage. Sometimes, I live in bliss, and it’s wonderful.


Robbie’s rise to fame began at the young age of 16 when he joined Take That. And soon, the singer started to drink and do cocaine and other drugs, which was why he was kicked out of the band. It’s hard to cope with the pressure of popularity and hectic schedule, so the struggle with depression and drug addiction continued after Williams started his solo career. Robbie has been in and out of rehab, and he said there were times when he was close to death.

When asked about his colleague George Michael’s passing and how it impacted him, the singer told The Sun:

The things I’ve put myself through, I’ve been close to… It’s like, ‘By the grace of God go I’. It’s been so close so many times.

It’s been a very similar roller-coaster, yes. And I miss George Michael, I wish he was here.

Was it 2016 when everybody popped off? It was just a dreadful year, all of everybody’s heroes­ disappear, you’re realizing you’re not immortal and never more so than being 43, having two kids.

It was just a dreadful thing to happen, and I miss him.


His life changed completely when Robbie met American actress Ayda Field, who later became his wife. On their first date, Robbie was “so high on drugs he was clucking like a chicken,” but it didn’t scare her off. He told The Sun about that night:

She nursed me, gave me exactly what I needed at that moment, a bit of loving.  She saw me at my worst the first night. And, quite interestingly, liked it.

Ayda was determined to help Robbie and with her support, he is clean now. The couple has two beautiful children, and Robbie’s family is what keeps him going.

Why is depression such a big issue?

Depression can take on many forms. Some people affected by it, especially women, tend to have more typical symptoms of the condition such as sadness. In men, manifestations of depression are usually different – the condition may show as anger and frustration.


Many depressed men and women are afraid that speaking out and seeking help will be seen as weakness by others, so they try to suppress the negative feelings with alcohol or drugs, which only makes the situation worse in the long term.

Depression can ruin self-esteem and confidence. It has ended so many relationships, careers, and even lives. If you think you or your loved one is depressed, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. Getting help when you really need it is a sign of strength, not weakness.

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